Greta Jennison's E-portfolio

I really liked the profile writing project assignment and think it was structured well and very informative on the process of writing profiles. The project began with proposing different options for people we could interview and why they would make an interesting profile. My three options for subjects were Dawn Deweese Moss (who I ended up going with), Morgan Dasilva (athletic trainer), and Coach K (strength and conditioning coach), all of these people would have been interesting profiles, but Dawn ended up being a great choice for a subject. I already knew Dawn very well because she was a senior goalie (and captain) for our team (UNE field hockey) last year. Dawn has been an amazing goalie mentor to me as a captain and now as a coach, and I was one of the main reasons why she decided to come back and coach, so I knew interviewing her would be really interesting. It also allowed me to learn more about her story and vulnerable side, which was cool to see. The interview itself went really well, Dawn had a lot of great things to say so I had many usable quotes to choose from. The themes of my piece started popping into my mind pretty soon into the interview once I started to get a feel for her story. I had a lot of questions to ask, but also ended up asking ones on the spot as they came up in conversation. The outline and 200 word draft was pretty simple to put together. I started by mapping out what information will go where in my writing (separating info out into categories so they made sense in the writing). I made sure to include the quotes from my subject, and I identified the themes of resilience, grit, and hard work in the outline. Additionally, I decided to include a Q&A section that allowed me to really let my subject do the talking. For my next draft, I fleshed out a lot of my writing, added a couple quotes, added to the Q&A section, added a sub-headline, and bolded section titles. This was the draft used in peer review. I received very helpful feedback and constructive criticism from Casey and Zak, and offered them feedback on their writing as well. Their suggestions were that I add more to a couple of the transition paragraphs, and get another quote from someone in my subject’s circle. After peer review I worked on revising my piece using a combination of feedback from them, and what I have learned from reading their writing. In the end I feel very confident about my writing and the growth I exemplified with each draft. Overall, I enjoyed this project and wonder what it would have looked like with my other subject choices.

What’s working – Casey

I really like the first paragraph, it gives an interesting hook to make you want to read more. You also do a great job making sure the subject gets to speak early on (quote in third paragraph), and allow the subject to have the last word with a super powerful quote about watching players grow up. I also think the overall structure/layout is good (no indentation, not introducing quotes, not using the I voice). You do a great job capturing a story and making it more than just a sports profile- we get to learn the vulnerable side of your subject and that is what drives the story. Lastly, I like the way the story moves along and somewhat falls chronologically, it makes it easy to follow.

Suggestions – Casey

The suggestions I can think of are mostly minor. I think you might want to add a bit more meat to some of your paragraphs that are just one or two sentences (I assume you were going to since this is only a draft), but some are just a bit too short and could just use some more information. Additionally, I noticed a very minor spelling error inside a quote, you said “every wants to win” and I think you might have meant to say “everyone wants to win”, super minor but definitely makes a difference because the quote is super powerful. Lastly, although I love how much you let your subject speak and how many quotes you got, if it isn’t a question and response section I would avoid putting a quote after every paragraph if that makes sense. 

What’s working – Zak

You do a really good job telling a story rather than just writing out an interview. I like how you made sure the subject got to speak very early on (third paragraph) and you include a good amount of quotes. I also like how the quotes are meaningful and have substance, it keeps the story interesting and really helps me get to know your subject. Additionally you do a good job keeping with reporting writing format (single spaces, no indentation, more). Lastly, I really enjoyed how conversational the writing is, it makes it feel like the reader is having the conversation. 

Suggestions – Zak

I could only think of a couple minor suggestions: I think you do a really great job using the quotes you have included but several are embedded within paragraphs instead of standing alone– you might know more than me or this might be something to ask Jesse about, but I just wasn’t sure if it was structurally okay to embed quotes into paragraphs or if they absolutely have to be standing alone (im not sure!). Lastly, you might want to consider adding a quote or moving a quote to the end of your writing to let your subject have the last word.

Peer Review Reflection:

Peer review was extremely helpful for this project. Not only does it allow for me to get feedback on my work, it also forces me to critique others’ work, which in turn helps me find flaws in my own writing. The process of making sure a peer’s writing has all pieces of the prompt definitely helped me make sure my writing had all the different parts as well. I received some really good feedback from Casey and Zak, they both offered constructive criticism that very much helped me turn my draft into a final piece. Some of the feedback they gave me had to do with adding more detail to some of the paragraphs, and getting an additional quote from someone in my subject’s circle. They complimented me on the structure of my story, how I handled the fragile/emotional parts of her story, along with how the themes of resilience come through. Zak and Casey also had mostly solid profiles but some of the feedback I offered included fleshing out some of their shorter paragraphs, ending with a quote, and fixing some minor grammatical errors. Overall, it was a helpful process that definitely added to the final draft.

Goalkeeping Against All Odds

Sports Profile on Student Athlete, Dawn DeWeese-Moss.

By: Greta Jennison

Dawn DeWeese-Moss of Pittsfield, Maine, had no plans of playing the sport of field hockey, especially not at the college level. But eight years, a championship ring, and a degree later, Dawn has come full circle by taking on the role of assistant coach at her alma mater, University of New England field hockey.

Dawn grew up playing a variety of sports like lacrosse, basketball, and track to name a few, but her field hockey journey started somewhat on the later side and Dawn took to the sport immediately. 

“I started playing in high school because my friends convinced me, I didn’t expect to end up this good at it” Dawn remarked. “The team needed another goalie, which looked just silly enough for me to try it.”

Her very first season playing she earned the role of starting GK, overtaking the pre-existing goalie very quickly. Dawn continued field hockey all four years of high school and joined the Maine Rapids field hockey club for several tournaments. 

“I didn’t want to play in college, but my club coach yelling at me for not trying to get recruited lit a fire in me and my mind was changed” She said. 

Interview/Response: Recruitment & NCAA Athletic Career

What was your recruitment process like?

My recruitment process was definitely different than most people because I was a 2020 senior. All the tournaments I would have normally gone to were cancelled due to Covid, so once I started emailing Coach (UNE Head Coach Danielle Collins), I had to make my own skills video because she needed to see film. Overall, it was a pretty short process because UNE was pretty much the only school I was seriously considering, and they happened to need a goalie.

Describe your college athletics journey?

My first season, preseason especially, was extremely rough for many reasons. College sports pre-season is hard on its own, but add on the fact that I was the only GK as a freshman and my mom was really sick at the time, it was unbelievably brutal. I was struggling so bad, but managed to get through the season with a good amount of playing time. From there I was on the come up. We earned a conference (CCC, now CNE) championship win sophomore year (2022), and I officially took the role of starting GK going into my junior season. My senior year we made it back to the championship game but sadly lost in overtime.

Why did you return to UNEFH and what  have you learned?

I love field hockey and love the team, and this was a way I could stay involved but at the commitment level that I chose. I felt like I had more to give to the sport and the program. I have learned a lot about coaching and leadership. I’ve worked hard on time management and organizational skills so I really thrived in the managerial aspect. 

What challenges have turned into defining moments in your life?

My mom passing away from cancer about a month after my freshman season was definitely a huge challenge that heavily affected me. But I used this as motivation to work hard athletically and academically. It was extremely difficult but I had no choice but to be resilient and keep pushing through. 

 “On the come up” Dawn DeWeese-Moss, 2025

Despite the unbelievably tough circumstances that Dawn endured, she graduated from UNE in 2025 with a degree in Applied Exercise Science and a perfect 4.0 GPA. Dawn’s personal resilience and success is remarkable but not only is she hardworking, she is also a strong leader and teammate that served as a captain for the 2024 season.

“Dawn has been a great role model as a teammate, captain, friend, and now assistant coach/goalie mentor. She is knowledgeable and reliable but also lights up any room she enters” Offered sophomore goalkeeper, Greta Jennison.

Dawn is currently a PA student at UNE and plans to become a physical therapist or possibly work in hospital medicine. She plans to stay in the Southern Maine area and continue assistant coaching with UNEFH. 

“Stuff happens, you have to be resilient. I’m always on the come up” Dawn DeWeese-Moss.

Profile 200wrd draft/Outline 

Keeping Up Against All Odds

By Greta Jennison

Outline:

Nut Graph

Quote

Life story/background

Quote

Interview/response about UNE Field Hockey journey (recruitment & career)

Motivation & Story theme: resilience, grit, hard work

Quote

What’s next + Future plans 

Dawn DeWeese Moss of Pittsfield, Maine, had no plans of playing the sport of field hockey, especially not at the college level. But eight years, a championship ring, and a degree later, Dawn has come full circle by taking on the role of an assistant coach here at her alma mater, UNE field hockey.

“I started playing in high school because my friends convinced me, I didn’t expect to end up this good at it”, Dawn remarked. “The team needed another goalie, which looked just silly enough for me to try it.”

She grew up playing a variety of sports like lacrosse, basketball, and track to name a few, but her field hockey journey started somewhat on the later side. Dawn took to the sport and position immediately. Her very first season playing she earned the role of starting GK, overtaking the pre-existing goalie very quickly. 

“I didn’t want to play in college, but my club coach yelling at me for not trying to get recruited lit a fire in me and my mind was changed” She said.

Interview/Response section about recruitment journey and career

What was your recruitment process like?

My recruitment process was definitely different than most people because I was a 2020 senior. All the tournaments I would have normally gone to were cancelled due to Covid, so once I started emailing Coach (UNE Head Coach Danielle Collins), I had to make my own skills video because she needed to see film. Overall, it was a pretty short process because UNE was pretty much the only school I was seriously considering, and they happened to need a GK.

What was your college athletics career like?

My first season, preseason especially, was extremely rough for many reasons. NCAA college pre season is hard on its own, but add on the fact that I was the only GK as a freshman and my mom was really sick at the time, it was unbelievably brutal. I was struggling so bad during quadruple sessions of preseason that coach gave me a session off, which is saying something. From there I was on the come up and played a good bit my freshman and sophomore year, but I officially took the role of starting GK going into my junior season. More…

Like 1 more q&a

Motivation & Story theme: resilience, grit, hard work

Quote

What’s next + Future plans